Talking about key components of good parenting, it is hard to have some definite formula because of this fast changing and challenging world. No one can be definite about these key components but according to some researchers, there are some key components of good parenting which will help you, as parent, in growing your child in a natural and systematic way positively and confidently.
As, it is an acknowledged fact that the relationships between youths and their parents are changing marvelously, still parents have a tremendous influence on their child’s behavior.
Researches show the key components of good parenting are association, independency, and parental control. Let us try to understand it detail.
Association is one of the key components of good parenting. Parents’ association with the children is very deep and solid. But, it has also been noted that parents often become less involved in the lives of their children as they show the average or below average educational results.
You, as a parent, can maintain contacts with your teen by showing affection and affirmative affect, paying attention and indicating emphatic understanding, constructing belief, displaying acceptance, and giving consent.
A good connection with grown-ups is one of the best safeguards; a teen has, as she develops.
There are unlimited range of attitudes, views and standards, which can disturb the parents to choose to nurture their child. Though these differences occur, yet being effective parent, you should adopt the following qualities to build association which is vital among three key components of good parenting.
Your youth needs grown-up fellows, I mean parents and others, who are to be available for her who may connect with her, communicate with her and spend time with her for her better growth. You should also communicate with her and show a genuine interest in her as a parent. Your affection will teach her how to learn caring and showing affection to others.
This key component for good parenting will bring you near to your child and help you understanding her. When you listen to your child it means to avoid interrupting and pay close attention to her. Listening can be beneficial if it is done in appropriate way in a quiet place where there is no interruption.
You must know that it is hard to listen carefully if you are trying to perform some chores or watch television. It is fact that often just talking with child about the problem or an issue helps to simplify things. Attending can also be the best way to expose a more grave difficult that needs attention.
Your youth needs your support as she struggles with difficulties that may seem unimportant to you and family. She needs praise when she has done her best. She needs encouragement to develop interests and personal characteristics. As a parent, you must praise and encourage her achievements. You are to offer your assistance to your child whenever she requires it.
If you show reverence and veneration to your teen, she will show reverence and veneration by following your footsteps as you are role model for her. If your teen is carefree and careless, you need not to worry about it. Despite this, your child needs to be treated with respect.
Showing respect teaches youth appropriate behavior and reinforces unrestricted affection in your child. You may not always love your child. You can exhibit respect by recognizing and appreciating your teen’s differences and treating her as an individual. Reverence also requires kindness and empathy. You should try to see things from your point of view and to consider your needs and feelings.
Conversation over dissimilarities
Having conversation with your child on dissimilarities can bring solution and remove grounds which cause dissimilarities and differences. Though, it is not easy in the beginning, yet having communication brings some solution.
You should not find it hard to manage differences with your child.
Differences of opinions are easier to manage when you recognize that these dissimilarities can deliver significant opportunities for you to reconsider your position.
Having negotiation with your child is also one of the key components of good parenting that is valuable for your teenager to develop.
If you come across differences, you should communicate concerns firmly but calmly and explain your position to help your teen understand the reasoning.
You know that the best way to inspire and motivate a behavior is to reward it.
Present yourself as role model
Present yourself as role model for your child because she needs strong role model. You should live the behavior and values that you hope your child will develop. When you set high standard for yourself and treat others with kindness and respect, your child has more chances of following your example.
As teen-ager explores possibilities of which she may become, she looks to you, peers, well-known personalities and others to define who she may become.
Independency of your child
It is an acknowledged fact that everyone wants independency. So, your child also demands freedom and she likes liberty as it is her basic right too. Giving freedom to your child is one of the key components of good parenting for you.
There are two common categories of independency which are emotional and behavioral.
Every teen has different mental level and she has right to enjoy emotional liberty. Give your child freedom to express her emotions freely. You should try to give respect to the emotions of your child. It will enable you to understand her emotions.
It is also called decisional independence. It is the ability which enables your teenager to make choices about her behavior. Emotional independence and behavioral independence are highly connected. As your teen becomes more emotionally independent, she desires to make more of her own choices.
Behavioral independence in early teen has been found to result in higher risk for deviation and poor academic performance. So, at early teen age your child needs full attention and care. You are to offer freedom in limited range to your child.
If you set solid criteria for your child’s freedom, it is much better for her grooming. Some parents allow too much of the wrong kind of freedom, or they offer freedom before the teen is ready to accept it.
Further, parents adhere too firmly, refuting young teens both the tasks they need to grow adult and the chances they want to make varieties and admit their penalties.
Here are some important parts of key components of good parenting to help balance lovingness and independence.
Set boundaries for your child
Being sensible and mature parent, you should set boundaries for your child. This part of key components of good parenting is necessary for you. It is a fact that children sometimes struggle limits, but they want them, and they need them.
In the whole world that can seem too absurd for you and your child alike are limits, but you must know that limits provide security to you and your child.
Often, it has been noted that teenagers whose parents do not set limits feel unloved. Setting limits is most effective for you when you set them early. It is tough but not impossible to get positive results that give benefit both you and your child.
Give clear commands to your child
If you are succeeded to be perfect for your child, it is one super key point among the key components of good parenting. It has been seen that mostly teens reply best to exact commands, which are repeated regularly. You should not give ambiguous requests, like, “I want your room clean.” Instead, you should say, “You keep your room very clean”.
You can further say, “I am going to held competition keeping the room clean and I hope you will be the winner.” Your child will be perfect and she will consider you perfect, which is the result of your perfect words, at perfect time that will keep her perfect.
Offer sensible selections to your child
As a parent, you are to think that choices make your teen more open to guidance. For example, you should suggest your child establishing the rule that homework must be done before bed. If you allow the teen to decide, she will do it. If you want to deny a teen something that she wants to do, you should suggest an acceptable alternative choice.
Be open to cooperate your child
As your teen gets older, rules may become more flexible and open to negotiate. You are supposed to listen to your teen’s concerns when you are discussing tasks, limitations, access to the car, and other rules and rights.
If you discuss and give guidelines to your teen, you can raise her ability to think independently, compromise and negotiate agreements which are all important life skills.
Allowance individuality in stages
Key components of good parenting help you in the development of your child. The more mature and responsible your teen’s behavior is, the more rights you can grant to your child. For example, allow a young teen to pick out new gym shoe within a specific price range is effective.
You will observe that later your teen may be able to manage her shopping of school clothes within a given budget. But you will have to approve purchases before you remove the tags. Finally, your teen can manage her clothing allowance without your supervision in given budget. She will feel confidence in her personality.
Give priority to fitness and protection
Your crucial responsibility, as a parent, is to protect your child’s health and safety. You should allow the child to know what things threaten her health and safety. Help her to take care of not only her health and safety but also of others.
The very decision may be an area of disagreement, as teenager often believes that nothing bad will happen to her. At the same time, she feels that everything she experiences is new and unique.
Make your child aware that her health and fitness is more important than that of any financial benefit.
Ignore the choice that disconnects future opportunities
You are to ignore the choices which may disconnect you from her future opportunities. If you are to negotiate on some points which you consider are wrong for your child, you will have to do it carefully in such a systematic and friendly atmosphere that always keeps you close to your child.
Nothing is so worth as a strong and authentic argument.
You should avoid too much haggle and refusal with your teen. When you insist that the answer is “No,” such as health and safety issues, or when the choice can cut off future options for her. Your teen may have a growing sense of the future, but she still lacks the experience, required to fully understand how a decision, she makes today, can affect her tomorrow.
You must talk to your teen about the lifelong consequences of the choices, she makes. You should help her understand, there are good and bad decisions and that knowing one from the other can make all the difference in her life.
Monitor and guide with balance
It is important for you, as parent, to strike the right balance between laying down the law and allowing too much freedom. You can easily maintain this balance between you and your teen by guiding but not controlling. Your teen needs chances to explore different roles; you should try on new character and experiment. She needs to learn that choices have consequences which mean making some mistakes and accepting the results.
However, you need to provide guidance so that your teen may avoid making too many poor choices. You can guide by being a good listener and by asking questions that help your teen to think about the results of her actions.
Allow your child make mistakes
Being parent, you want your child to grow into adults who can solve problems and make good choices. These abilities are an essential part of being independent. You are to develop these abilities, however, your teen, on occasions, needs to fail, provided the dangers are not too high and no one’s health or safety is at risk.
Making mistakes also allows her to learn one critical skill which is how to bounce back. You must teach your child how to learn from mistakes.
Framing schedules ensure consequences
Sensible parents frame such schedules which ensure consequences and guide your child on the right track. You are to know that consequences are a result of choices and how people calculate their choices and decision making processes.
You, as parent, can help your child how to follow the rules, respect authority, and understand good decision making by providing consequences. Your child focuses on the consequence more than her behavior.
Keep control over your child
One of the most effective key components of good parenting that matters is your control over your child. You regulate your child’s behavior through supervision, appropriate limits, and discipline. Regulation teaches your child self-control and respect for the rules.
It has been noted that parenting style is very crucial for upbringing and I suggest authoritative parenting style for you to adopt in order to drive your child on right track with flexibility.
You should keep in mind that most parents do not follow any style completely. Furthermore, sometimes, parenting style changes from one child to the next or in times when the parent spends more or less time and energy for parenting.
Parenting styles can also be affected by concerns; the parent has in other areas of her life.
As parent, you are to adopt flexible style that is neither strict nor loose like authoritative parenting style.
In a nutshell
Parenting is the most important job you will ever have as a parent. It is also one of the most challenging jobs for you as a parent.
Above mentioned key components of good parenting can help you in nurturing your child in an effective way. Your job of parenting changes as your child grows and becomes mature. You require adjusting to the needs and ages of your child.
When you find any positive change in your child, it is good idea to appreciate and celebrate the positive changes. You are to manage time to talk and listen to your child. It is your obligation to teach responsibility to your child constructively.
You are supposed to be kind, firm and consistent for the betterment of your teenager.